art. jesus. coffee. people. books. creating. in no particular order.
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September 22, 2009

What if Life had a Rest Button?

I remember sitting in the play room as a child playing on my old NES getting frustrated at every level that I couldn't complete with ease. Cursing under my breath so that mom would not hear. The 8-bit graphics could frustrate me more than anything real life could throw at me. There would come a point where I would get so angry that I would just in a fit of subdued "rage" take my frustrations out on a poor defenseless piece of molded plastic with the faded red ink that read "reset". One simple press is all it took, but my vindication was sought upon that button.
   I would then sit back down and restart the same game that I had just quit.  Only to realize that those same sticking points, those same hardships were all there... and I had to beat them again... again! (remember this is the time before you had hard drives and save files in games)
   Did this ever change?  Not until save files!  Did slamming that reset button ever successfully do anything?  No.  It just made things harder and gave you a major case of deja vu.
   I for one am glad that there is no reset button for life... I mean really, does anyone want to go through their awkward stage of the "tweens" again?  Or how about diapers?  Formula?  That time you wet the bed?

September 19, 2009

I am ill equipped.

I am ill equipped to do all the grand things that my heart desires on my own. When will I stop trying to rely on myself and rely on the one who has done greater things that my wildest imagination can imagine?

I have the desire now I need to drop the fear.

**image by Todd Powelson

September 14, 2009


-Random meetings of people on the street which leads to an hour long talk on the sidewalk.
-Homeless people bathing in the fastfood bathrooms
-Food Cart lines
-crazy homeless people playing music.
-horse and carriages walking next to cars driving
-the art and theatre scene
-the grungy hipster kid who, is obviously not, sitting on the sidewalk holding a sign that reads "I need money so I can stop eating cardboard."
-seeing the nice rite aid worker man handle a dude stealing something in Rite Aid, no more than 2 minutes after he nicely pointed me to the travel toothbrushes.

Even though I have only been gone for a little more than a week. It seems like so much longer. They say distance makes the heart grow fonder. What if my heart has never left in the first place?

September 8, 2009


seasonscape by alexiuss.deviantart.com     I’m realizing as I get more and more involved in the christian culture that people talk about seasons in more than a simple weather terminology. I had never heard this before. A season of life, of the year. There can be many seasons of... something in one weather season.
     I have always believed in life changes happening around season changes. The end of the summer came and that ended my stint in Philly and i moved back to Jersey. As I moved to the place where everyone vacations too; all those vacationers were making their way back to wherever they lived. Having grown up here I have always seen this. In April we would see businesses start preparing for the onslaught of new people to, sadly, take advantage of with the high prices and cheap products. May would bring the population of my area up 200-300% Then in August a mass exodus would happen. Students leaving for school, vacation families leaving, some businesses closing. Another “season” on the books.
     It’s always easier to see what lead up to the closing of a season when it’s not your own. I’m back home in Jersey. Trying to figure out what my time here is meant to teach me. its showing me a lot of things. Good thing and bad things both about myself and what has become of my family over the past four years. ( when I was in school I didn’t go home very often during school ). This very short time has already shown me the way God has worked within me as I have
     Sitting here and hearing and seeing the suburban antics makes me realize more and more I am an Urban dweller and my heart is in the city; but for this season of my life I, for some reason, I am in a shore suburbanite... I know I’ll learn and be stretched during this season... I just hope that before the next season, I am onto my personal next season.

For now... my only seasonal chore is to... job hunt and get a friggin job! haha