"Lord..." (reposted)

It's amazing how over two years ago I wrote this prayer and it still rings true to this very day. This was originally written (published 10.29.09) for a friend's online magazine, it has since gone under but remains online as to not break links or lose the articles written for it.
(I found my prayer on a community on livejournal, I had no clue that it was found let alone posted. Its amazing how God can use our words to help people that we may never know)

this is what love looks like...

image from los @ ragamuffinsoul

We can learn so much from this group of Egyptian Christians forming a human barrier around muslims praying during the protests in Egypt. We're not called to hate on other religions we're called to love people.

"I don't believe in total freedom for the artist. Left on his own, free to do anything he likes, the artist ends up doing nothing at all. If there's one thing that's dangerous for an artist, it's precisely this question of total freedom, waiting for inspiration and the rest of it."

—Federico Fellini, I'm a Born Liar

Reading Culture Making and spending time digesting what I read has been pretty convicting... but then again so has a lot lately.  I seem to be praying for direction a lot lately becasue I'm wandering around (or maybe more of sitting still) confused.

**artwork; "Waiting for Inspiration" by Leith O'Malley

I am ill equipped.

I am ill equipped to do all the grand things that my heart desires on my own. When will I stop trying to rely on myself and rely on the one who has done greater things that my wildest imagination can imagine?


I have the desire now I need to drop the fear.

**image by Todd Powelson

Needs and wants.

In my last post I spoke about how restless I have been for a while. I still am, but I just felt the urge to publicly praise and thank god for giving me what he gave me this morning.

This morning I wake up tired, like I have been for the past few weeks, why I don't know. I have a feeling it might be because of the heat and that the air conditioning unit for the public areas of my apartment building is right outside my bedroom window; which is right where the head of my bed is located. So I wake up and I'm tired, so tired that I almost say screw church and just stay home and not sleep. After falling back asleep for a few minutes I decided to get up and go make a cup of coffee and see what happened. So, I make my coffee and breakfast, go over to my window and just sit there looking out at the corner. Then it happened... an amazing sense of calmness came over me as I just looked out over the intersection, there were few people out, the ones that were just strolled and enjoyed their coffee, there were no cars and just the sounds of birds singing. Then I just at that moment started talking to God, thanking him for this amazing sense of calmness he gave me. I just sat there, calm, still, knowing that God is, was and will be. After that I just went back into my room, popped on some music and layed on my bed just resting before church.

Then it hit me, if I know that God is and was and will be the great provider, why do I worry? Why do I stress? God gives you what you want when you need what you want.

Lord I want to thank you for being a God who knows what your children need and when to give them what they want. Thank you for always being there for us when sometimes; we aren't there for you. Lord, I pray that you can give the rest of your children that are restless and frustrated that amazing sense of calmness that you so graciously gave to me this morning. Thank you for letting me sit there and bask in the glory that is your world and your creation. Amen.